Nov. 30

Nov. 30: I was very tired today from staying up so late working on my application the other night. Tonight was the ward date night to Trafalga. Most nights Nathaniel and I hang out at my apartment and watch a movie and just sit on the couch. These are all upon my request because I'm always tired from the week. Nathaniel really likes to go out and have fun and so he was excited for this ward date.
I was so tired and just wanted to stay home instead of going. Nathaniel even offered to stay instead of going, but I knew it wouldn't be fair to him, since he really wanted to go. As we went around looking for people we could get rides with, I was tempted to purposely miss people so we couldn't catch a ride with them. I wanted to pretend that I was bummed that we couldn't go, but really inside be happy we weren't. That wouldn't be honest though.
I knew how much it meant to Nathaniel, so I decided to forget my wants and do what he wished and do all those things with honesty. We found a ride, we went, and had fun. This was helpful to my relationship with Nathaniel, because if I was dishonest with him it could have hurt his trust in me. Instead, it grew.

Nov. 29

Nov. 29: I'm applying for the Graphic Design major here at BYU. Today I turned in my application. I worked on it all night last night and all day today. While I worked on it I came to many stumps where I couldn't come up with anything to design or draw. I looked online for inspiration. When I found things I liked, the thoughts came into my head, "Just submit these pictures you found. They're really good and you will get in for sure with these."
Quickly I recognized that these thoughts were not filled with honesty or integrity. It would be against my morals and standards to steal someone else's creation and use it as my own. I continued working on my own designs, and even though they weren't as good, they were mine and I felt honest turning them in on my application.

Nov. 28

Nov. 28: Tonight I went to a gingerbread house making activity with Nathaniel. A lot of our friends were there as well. Nathaniel bought tickets to go see Divine Comedy this Friday, but instead we decided to go Saturday and go on my ward date trip on Friday. So we were trying to find people to sell his tickets to. He was selling them for $10. One girl kept trying to haggle him and get them for $7. She was very persuasive and stubborn. Nathaniel really only wanted to sell them for $10 because that's how much he bought them for and he didn't want to lose any money.
When he was away for a few minutes, she tried convincing me to convince Nathaniel to sell the tickets to her for cheaper. I knew that I probably could convince him after a while. I was being persuaded by her. Then I remembered that it was important to Nathaniel that he sold them for full price because he didn't want to lose any money. I had to be honest with her and tell her that I couldn't do that. By doing so, I was being honest to Nathaniel as well, and helping him with his endeavors. I wasn't being deceitful and I was acting with integrity. She ended up respecting his wishes as well and buying them for $10.

Nov. 27

Nov. 27: Since I am going on a mission in January, I have been meeting with my bishop to prepare for the temple. Or rather, I have scheduled appointments to meet with him. The last two appointments I have missed because I forgot, or scheduled something at the same time. Tonight I had one as well. When I scheduled this appointment I prioritized it above everything else, because I knew it was super important.
I learned my lesson from before that it is not good to be flakey and let things get in the way of important obligations. If I had let something get in the way of today's appointment, I would have felt dishonest and disrespectful towards my bishop for making an appointment with him and not showing up. I went to the meeting and had a wonderful time and I know that he was happy that I could make it as well.

Nov. 26

Nov. 26: Tonight I got to do something that every BYU student wishes they could do. I got to go up to the top of the bell tower where the organ is. I felt really cool being up there, thinking of all the people I could tell and how awesome I would sound. I knew that Nathaniel would be envious especially, because he loves these kinds of adventures.
When I was at the top I texted him telling him I was there. As I did so, I thought to myself that I should invite him so he could love it and enjoy it himself rather than me bragging to him about it later. I invited him since he was only five minutes away, and he was super excited to get this opportunity. Again, this was humbling to let go of my pride. But it was wonderful to give to another, and be honest with another, and see how happy it can make them.

Nov. 25

Nov. 25: Today was another long driving day. This one was more bearable for some reason. The boys were less obnoxious. Last time my brother drove the whole time, which I liked because I hate driving. This time, he didn't want to drive the whole time. When he asked if someone else wanted to drive, I kept quiet. Nobody else was offering either. In my head I kept thinking, "it's your car, you should drive. It's the responsible and the right thing to do."
Even though I didn't want to drive, I volunteered myself. It wasn't a bad drive at all, and I was happy I did it because that way I let the passengers ride as they pleased. It feels good to make the right decision and not have to worry about the guilty feelings you would have if you didn't make that choice.

Nov. 24

Nov. 24: About a week ago a little girl in my home ward called me and asked me to lead the music at her baptism. I'm not very good at leading music, but this little girl is special to me and I said that I would do it. Today was her baptism. My family was running late for it. I thought to myself, since everyone else in my family is running late, I can move slowly too because we'll still be just as late if I did move quickly.
That didn't feel right, and instead I got ready as fast I could and waited ready in the car. This way we weren't all lingering in the house waiting for others. We were able to get to the baptism on time and I was able to lead the music for the baptism. I was honoring my word to the little girl that I would be there to lead the music. Perhaps if I got ready slowly I would have slowed down my family even more and we wouldn't have made it on time to lead the music. I showed integrity by respecting her request and being there on time.

Nov. 23

Nov. 23: I got my mission call today!!! I wasn't as excited as I am now, earlier today. Earlier today I was very very nervous about where I would go. When I received my call, and before I looked where I was going, everyone surrounded around me. I had lots of people on skype on different iphones, ipads, and computers, and other people on the phone. I was overwhelmed. I was nervous that I would disappoint them if I sounded unhappy with my call when I opened it.
I prayed that I would be able to love wherever I go and be happy when I received my call. When I read that I was going to the "Columbus, Ohio" mission I shouted for joy. It was real honest joy, and not deceitful or fake. Being honest in my expression was showing integrity today.

Nov. 22

Nov. 22: Today was Thanksgiving! There was lots to be done. We were sharing Thanksgiving dinner with another family in our ward, but the mother of that family got sick yesterday, so my mother took it upon herself to cook basically everything for us and this other family. Being home from school, I wanted to take the time to sit around, watch movies and relax. Watching my mother work hard, I knew that being lazy wouldn't feel rewarding.
I helped my mother cook dinner today, and built my character by learning new skills and being helpful to another person. I honored my relationship with my mother and showed integrity by choosing to do what Heavenly Father felt was right rather than what I wanted to do.

Nov. 21

Nov. 21: Holidays are great! There is lots of shopping! Even better, holidays at home when you are normally back at college are great because you get to go shopping with your parents and they are so willing to buy everything for you. I went shopping with my mother today. There was something that I really wanted to buy. I knew that if I asked her to buy it she totally would, and then I wouldn't have to spend my own money.
I then remembered that I have four younger siblings that don't have jobs and are depending on my parents' money for everything that they need. I felt that it was important for me to buy my own things since I had the capability to do so. It felt honest. I bought the item myself and didn't even bother asking my mom do buy it. I felt good buying it myself because I felt like I was being fair to my younger siblings and honoring my mother. This helped build my character because I was learning how to depend on myself as well as respecting and honoring my parents.

Nov. 20

Nov. 20: Today was a very very very long day. We drove for fourteen hours from Utah to California. I was in the car with myself and three other boys. This got old and annoying very quickly. I didn't know how I was going to last fourteen hours straight in the car with them. I prayed and prayed that I would have the patience to ride with them, and that I would last the whole car ride without exploding.
It was humbling to me to keep quiet and not be impatient with the guys in the car, my brother. The car ride didn't feel any shorter, but somehow I was able to keep my cool the entire ride home. I was honoring my integrity by being respectful to others even if they weren't being respectful to me, and for letting go of my pride.

Nov. 19

Nov 19. I went to work today. That may seem easy and obviously important, but sometimes it's really hard to get myself to go. My grade doesn't depend on it, it can be really boring, I can be really tired, and  I could use that time to do something else. Today I really wanted to call in and just say that I couldn't make it, even though I could.
I highly respect my boss. She trusts me and respects me, and for that I even respect her more. By going to work I am honoring her and her choice in hiring me. I went to work today and I felt good about being honest. There was no deception involved, and instead it was replaced by integrity.

Nov. 18

Nov. 18: Today I did a very small act of integrity. The task was small, but the outcome was great. I brought my scriptures to church today. I bring my scriptures to church every Sunday, but I am always tempted to leave them at home so I don’t have to carry them around. Today I looked at them sitting on my desk, and knew I could just leave them there and I would be okay. I knew though, that’s not what the Lord wanted.

            I have scriptures so I can study them, read them, and learn from them. I brought them to church today, and was able to open to verses and chapters in the classes and participate and learn. It was a blessing to honor the scriptures and show integrity to my God above.

Nov. 17

Nov. 17: It’s really easy to be selfish. As I have mentioned before, Nathaniel pays for me for a lot of meals and other activities and dates. I want to give back to him, but at the same time I don’t want to spend a lot of my money. I know that he likes to eat a lot, so if I pay for him for a meal, it will be more expensive than I would like.

            Sacrificing is honoring integrity, and sacrificing $10-$20 for someone who pays much more for you is the least you can do to give back to them. I took Nathaniel out to eat today, and even though I was nervous about the money, I felt good afterwards knowing that I did something that he felt grateful for, and that what I did showed that I am grateful for him. It was an act of giving back, and that helped build my character.

Nov. 16

Nov 16. One of my old friends, Jacob, just got back from his mission in the Philippines. He came to Utah today to visit family, and asked if he could see me as well. I really wanted to see him, but I also wanted to spend all of my free time with my boyfriend Nathaniel, so my initial plan was to bring Nathaniel with me to see Jacob. I spoke to my mom about it, and she said it would probably be awkward and uncomfortable for Jacob to be around me if I’m holding hands or cuddling up with Nathaniel. After all, he just wants to see me and be able to talk to just me.

            I really wanted to keep spending time with Nathaniel but I knew that it would be better to see Jacob on my own. That is exactly what I did. I was respecting Jacob and his wishes by allowing us to spend time with just each other so he could catch up with an old friend after being shell-shocked back into America. I know it was comforting to him.

Nov. 15

Nov. 15: When I came to BYU I somehow adapted the mindset to “choose the more fun option because I will remember it longer.” This applied to things such as ice skating or a paper, and other things like that. Today I sacrificed that view and habit and put my homework in front of the fun things I had the option to do.

            Prioritizing is honoring integrity, as I have said a lot before. Today I experienced the blessings of prioritizing again, and was able to feel complete with doing what I really needed to do.

Nov. 14

Nov. 14: Some days in my persuasive writing class we have to turn in papers. We turn in two drafts on different days, a rough draft and a final draft. When we turn in our rough draft, it never makes it to our teacher and we only use it for peer reviews during the class period. Today I realized that I’m not even getting graded on my rough draft and so there’s no point in writing it.

            I was very very tempted to not write my paper because my teacher would never know and it would save me time and the dreary/boringness of writing a paper. But, it just didn’t feel right. It didn’t feel right because if I didn’t write my paper, then I wouldn’t be contributing to my classmates which wouldn’t be helping my teacher. I felt it was right to write my paper whether it was being graded or not. I benefited from this act of integrity because I was able to get good feedback on my paper that helped me write a better final draft and get a good grade.

Nov. 13

Nov. 13: Similar to yesterday’s integrity act, I got up early this morning to eat breakfast with my boyfriend Nathaniel. I only have a coupe days each week where I don’t have to wake up early, and I treasure those mornings because I can sleep a little bit more. Nathaniel asked me to eat breakfast with him this morning, and even though I was used to my sleeping in routine and liked it, I knew that it was important to him and got up to eat with him.

            Not only was I honoring our relationship, but I was honoring my body and my day by getting up early. Getting up early builds character and is a wonderful habit to create.

Nov. 12

Nov. 12: Every Monday I have class from 5:10pm-6:25pm. Usually I use my time afterwards to do things that I need to do to start off my week. Today my brother called me after class and invited me to come eat dinner with him. Part of me wanted to go eat with him, but a lot of me wanted to just go home after a long day on campus and just get things done.

I think part of honoring integrity is prioritizing family and showing your love towards them. I decided to go eat with my brother tonight, and see how he was doing. I felt good about spending time with him because it was important to him, me, and my parents.

Nov. 11

Nov. 11: I got a new job about two months ago around the same time that I moved into my new ward and started school. While I’ve been busy with school, making new friends, and going to work, I’ve been making money. Every Sunday so far I keep remembering that I really need to pay my tithing.

            Today I had had enough. My money was piling up, and my tithing amount that I needed to pay was getting so high that I was starting to think that I couldn’t afford to pay tithing. That was a ridiculous thought because really, my tithing money isn’t my money at all, and if I had paid it right when I had received all that money in the separate increments of time they came, I wouldn’t feel so overwhelmed now. I knew it was really important to pay the amount of tithing I was supposed to pay, and that I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t. Even though it wasn’t easy, I paid the full amount of tithing today and did it with integrity.

Nov. 10

Nov. 10: I usually sleep in on Saturdays. Today, I didn’t. Today instead of sleeping in a doing nothing I decided to be productive. I got up, got ready, gather my notebooks and laptop, and headed to the library. I spent multiple hours at the library studying and doing homework today.

            With doing this I was recognizing the importance of my education and prioritizing and was productive with my day doing good things. I am building character when I am using my time wisely, and studying on a Saturday is the definition of using my time wisely. 

Nov. 9

Nov. 9: Today I cleaned my room. Honestly, there aren’t many things that are more wonderful and good feeling than that. This was an act of integrity for me. To me, cleaning my room is the right thing to do. I honor myself more when I am in a clean environment, particularly an environment that depends on how I treat it myself.

            I found free time, and instead of being lazy and watching TV, I cleaned my room. I was honoring myself and my roommate with doing so, because cleaning a room is an act of respect.

Nov. 8

Nov. 8: Today I was given two free tickets to a concert. My boyfriend takes me everywhere and always buys me lunch and dinner, and I always talk to him about how I will take him out someday. These tickets gave me that chance. I didn’t have to tell him that I got them for free, and he would think that I paid for him for something.

            Even though that wasn’t lying, it wasn’t being honest, and so I told him that I got the tickets for free. Although it may have made no difference to him, it made a difference for me knowing that I wasn’t keeping a secret from him. I felt free and filled with integrity.

Nov. 7

Nov. 7: I took an exam today. I wasn’t planning to take it today, but was planning to take it later and pay a late fee. Today I ended up having a lot more free time then planned, and I could do whatever I wanted with it. I wanted to take a nap, but I continually thought that I should use the time to study and take my exam today instead of waiting.

            I did use the time to study, and in the leftover time I had enough time to go and take my exam tonight. It felt really good to act now, instead of being acted upon (paying a late fee). Procrastinating doesn’t feel honorable to me, and I don’t feel like I’m building character when I do so. But when I take the chance to get things done when I can, I do feel like I’m building character.

Nov. 6

Nov. 6: Today was voting day. Even though we’re at BYU and mostly everyone is conservative and are voting for Mitt Romney, there are still people on campus who have different opinions and are voting for Barrack Obama. It was tempting to join in the crowd and say things about how Barrack Obama isn’t going to win and how Mitt Romney is better.

            I decided to instead be respectful and honorable towards both candidates. Obama is our president after all and we need to honor him for the position he is in currently. I did not join in the crowd with any bashing and instead stayed quiet. This was my way of showing integrity today.

Nov. 5

Nov. 5: My friend is in the film program. Today she needed actors for a movie she needed to take for a class project. She asked me a few days ago if I could be in it for her, and I told her yes. When I said yes, I really meant “yes if I have the time,” but I told her a solid yes.

            Although I knew it would take up a lot of time today, I told her that I would do it for her, which was promising to her. I made the movie with her and a few others and had a really good time. It was great to see that I was benefiting somebody else and helping her with what she needed instead of what I needed. Since I prioritized my integrity, I felt more whole later.

            

Nov. 4

Nov. 4: Sundays are a day of rest, and I love to take naps on Sundays. My ward calling is a ward missionary. Since there aren’t really any non-members in our ward, or really anywhere near around us, the only way I can really magnify my calling is to go to my meetings. Today my ward missionary leader scheduled our meeting to be at 2pm, right in the middle of nap time.

            I was sort of upset about it, and wanted to complain about being so busy during the week and never got a chance to rest, and today was my only opportunity, but I couldn’t do that. This was my calling, a calling from God, and I needed to respect it. Instead of taking a nap, I did a few things I needed to do before my meeting, and then went to the meeting. We talked about important things and it was a really good thing I was there. I could have said that I slept through it, but instead I was full of integrity and went to my meeting as I should have and was honest in my doings.

Nov. 3

Nov. 3: I got a Presidential election ballot in the mail because I am voting in representation for California and I currently live in Utah. I got the ballot about a week ago but I haven’t filled it out because I’ve been to busy and when I have free time I put it off until later. This morning I still hadn’t sent it out. I felt as though by now I didn’t need to send it, and just one person wouldn’t make a difference anyways.

            This was a very critical election, where a member of the church could take office as the President of our country for the first time, and he needed all the help he could get. Even though Mitt Romney wouldn’t know whether or not I sent in my ballot for him or not, I knew that it was my duty to do so and support him. I sat on my couch, filled out my ballot, and mailed it in. It felt good to be honorable.

Nov. 2

Nov. 2: Today I had the opportunity to do the dishes for my roommates. As I brought my dirty plate and fork to the sink I thought to myself, “I could just leave it in the sink, one of my roommates will probably do it later.”

            Then I remembered that my roommates do the dishes all the time, and throughout the entire semester so far, I had only done them a couple of times. It would not only be charitable but it would be fair if I did them because really it was “my turn” to do them according to how long it was until the last time I did them. Because of my internal obligation, I did the dishes. It only took about five minutes out of my day, and I felt good afterwards for doing something honorable.

Nov. 1

Nov. 1: This morning it was hard to wake up. I had a late night because it was Halloween and I was having fun celebrating. This morning I also had class at 9:30am. My teacher doesn’t take attendance and I knew that I would be okay in that class if I didn’t go, and it would be so much easier to sleep in, because the next thing after that class was work and that wasn’t until 11.

            When I woke up for my class it was my instinct to just close my eyes and fall back asleep. I felt guilty though for knowing that my parents had to take out a loan to allow me to attend school this semester, and I wanted to be able to tell them that I’m going to classes and doing my best in my classes. I decided to go to my class, because although it didn’t feel convenient or comfortable, it felt right.